Newspaper Ads

FOR SALE: 1957 Sedan. This (adjective) car is in a/an (adjective) condition. It was formerly owned by a/an (adjective) school teacher who always drove it (adverb). There is a/an (adjective) (noun) in the back seat and a chrome (noun) on the hood. It has a/an (adjective) paint job, (adjective) tires, and the back opens out into a/an (adjective) (noun). Will consider taking slightly used (noun) in trade.

LOST: In the vicinity of (geographical location), a/an (adjective) French poodle with (adjective) hair and a/an (adjective) tail. It answers to the name of (name of person in room) and when last seen was carrying a/an (noun) in its mouth. A/An (adjective) reward is offered.

Millie said...
FOR SALE: 1957 Sedan. This pummeled with pillows car is in a wrinkly and crusty condition. It was formerly owned by a pejorative school teacher who always drove it jackrabbit-catchingly. There is an orange peel-covered professional armpit sniffer in the back seat and a chrome ugly plant on the hood. It has a flapping in the breeze paint job, filled with sugary goodness tires, and the back opens out into an acidic Grandma's knickers. Will consider taking slightly used eyelash mite in trade.

LOST: In the vicinity of Rentown, USA, a numerological French poodle with blistered and oozing hair and an iris-sniffing tail. It answers to the name of Lola the Showgirl and when last seen was carrying a spoon bent with mind power in its mouth. A fey reward is offered.

Heffalump said...
FOR SALE: 1957 Sedan. This blatant car is in a grandmother approved condition. It was formerly owned by a fire-breathing school teacher who always drove it terrifyingly. There is a buttock clenching sequinned jacket in the back seat and a chrome glass eye on the hood. It has a fist shaking paint job, dizzying tires, and the back opens out into a klepto-inspired wooden shoe. Will consider taking slightly used tomahawk in trade.

LOST: In the vicinity of Cawker City, Kansas, Home to the World's largest ball of twine, a fedora wearing French poodle with samba dancing through the night hair and a ewe-like tail. It answers to the name of Ernesto the bald troubador and when last seen was carrying a dancing bear in its mouth. A not as smart as a first grader reward is offered.

(Sorry about that, Heff! That's what happens when Millie leaves her house... she gets confused)