Horoscope

Those born under the planetary sign of the (noun) possess (adjective) personalities and are forever searching for new (plural noun) to conquer. This is a more or less (adjective) month for you because the planet (silly word) is directly over your (noun) and Mercury is influencing your (plural noun). This means you should avoid eating (plural noun) and stay away from anybody with (adjective) (plural noun). During the coming year you will find conditions getting (adjective) due to your (adjective) outlook on life and your (adjective) attitude toward (plural noun). You are best suited to a (adjective) mate with (adjective) (plural noun) and a (adjective) complexion, which means, of course, that you can look forward to a really (adjective) life.

Heffalump said...
Those born under the planetary sign of the chimpanzee possess purple personalities and are forever searching for new siblings to conquer. This is a more or less stretchy month for you because the planet Sesquipedalian is directly over your rutabaga and Mercury is influencing your aliens. This means you should avoid eating farmers and stay away from anybody with aboriginal Christmas lights. During the coming year you will find conditions getting mustache-wearing due to your dappled outlook on life and your slimy attitude toward rubber gloves. You are best suited to an adequate mate with expectant M&Ms and a slim complexion, which means, of course, that you can look forward to a really sour-faced life.

Klin said...
Those born under the planetary sign of the lame billing department possess glowing personalities and are forever searching for new Mogadorians to conquer. This is a more or less fruity month for you because the planet Lady GaGa is directly over your Crazy 8 store and Mercury is influencing your travelers. This means you should avoid eating Lorien Symbols and stay away from anybody with warm and vanilla-y aliens. During the coming year you will find conditions getting ice cold due to your freakin' outlook on life and your tired attitude toward new cars. You are best suited to a huddled mate with loud snowflakes and a lousy complexion, which means, of course, that you can look forward to a really smelly life.

Millie said...
Those born under the planetary sign of the shrinkage possess rhymes like Dr. Seuss personalities and are forever searching for new misguided Obama supporters to conquer. This is a more or less oddly protruding month for you because the planet Flagellum is directly over your slurped soup and Mercury is influencing your plum tarts. This means you should avoid eating old coots and stay away from anybody with Honeycomb cereal-horfing goobies. During the coming year you will find conditions getting light switchy due to your pants optional outlook on life and your crispy attitude toward public butt pinchers. You are best suited to a shifty-eyed mate with frequently bamboozled wooden legs named Smith and a razor-tailed complexion, which means, of course, that you can look forward to a really can't spare a square life.