Friday, January 23, 2009

Happy Birthday!

Friends, this gathering is a surprise party for (name of girl in room). We are here to celebrate her (noun). All of her most (adjective) friends are here, including me, her devoted and faithful (noun). I must say that she doesn't look a day over (number). Naturally, we have some presents. (Boy in room) brought her a beautiful copper (noun) that she can wear on her lovely (noun). And our hostess got her a dozen (plural noun) that she can hang in her bathroom. And we had the bakery send up a huge (adjective) (noun) with candles on it. We all want to wish her a very (adjective) birthday and many happy (plural noun). Now let's all sing together: "Happy (noun) to you!"

Thorny Tree Lady said...
Friends, this gathering is a surprise party for Brand New Baby Cupcake. We are here to celebrate her pacifier. All of her most poopy friends are here, including me, her devoted and faithful breast pump. I must say that she doesn't look a day over 5. Naturally, we have some presents. Bart Simpson brought her a beautiful copper newborn diaper that she can wear on her lovely C-Section scar. And our hostess got her a dozen diaper wipes that she can hang in her bathroom. And we had the bakery send up a huge adorable nipple cream with candles on it. We all want to wish her a very baby powder-smelling birthday and many happy pain pills. Now let's all sing together: "Happy Hospital Bill to you!"

Natalie said...
Friends, this gathering is a surprise party for Wibbly Wobbly Wanda. We are here to celebrate her old lady feathered swimming cap. All of her most eyeballing everyone in the room friends are here, including me, her devoted and faithful skankwad. I must say that she doesn't look a day over 234. Naturally, we have some presents. Hungry Hungry Hugo brought her a beautiful copper toe-curling belch that she can wear on her lovely random bus rider. And our hostess got her a dozen pocket-protecting nerds that she can hang in her bathroom. And we had the bakery send up a huge, thinks "harrass" is two words instead of one, Oprah-phile with candles on it. We all want to wish her a very paper-cut-giving birthday and many happy Xanadu fans. Now let's all sing together: "Happy Cat-eating Alien to you!"

b. said...
Friends, this gathering is a surprise party for Syd. We are here to celebrate her muffin. All of her most sleepy friends are here, including me, her devoted and faithful blouse. I must say that she doesn't look a day over four. Naturally, we have some presents. Hoss brought her a beautiful copper business card that she can wear on her lovely paper cutter. And our hostess got her a dozen slippers that she can hang in her bathroom. And we had the bakery send up a huge satisfied crushed ice with candles on it. We all want to wish her a very hilarious birthday and many happy fingers. Now let's all sing together: "Happy Flat Iron to you!"

Klin said...
Friends, this gathering is a surprise party for Maggie. We are here to celebrate her mouse. All of her most funny friends are here, including me, her devoted and faithful scream. I must say that she doesn't look a day over 14. Naturally, we have some presents. Oldest brought her a beautiful copper dog that she can wear on her lovely son. And our hostess got her a dozen frames that she can hang in her bathroom. And we had the bakery send up a huge loud massage with candles on it. We all want to wish her a very saweet birthday and many happy garbage cans. Now let's all sing together: "Happy Lamp to you!"

Becky said...
Friends, this gathering is a surprise party for Olive Oyl. We are here to celebrate her wilted green spinach. All of her most off-white friends are here, including me, her devoted and faithful Tuesday. I must say that she doesn't look a day over 867-5309. Naturally, we have some presents. Popeye brought her a beautiful copper hamburger that she can wear on her lovely metal garbage can. And our hostess got her a dozen whining children that she can hang in her bathroom. And we had the bakery send up a huge slimiest uber-strength with candles on it. We all want to wish her a very loathsome birthday and many happy ice encrusted cars. Now let's all sing together: "Happy Anchor Tattoo to you!"

Dalene said...
Friends, this gathering is a surprise party for Veronica. We are here to celebrate her spent mousetrap. All of her most belly-up friends are here, including me, her devoted and faithful abandoned Facebook account. I must say that she doesn't look a day over 642. Naturally, we have some presents. Joe brought her a beautiful copper pile of toenail clippings that she can wear on her lovely bleeping beeping alarm clock. And our hostess got her a dozen splintered railroad ties that she can hang in her bathroom. And we had the bakery send up a huge conspicuously vacant ball of dryer lint with candles on it. We all want to wish her a very pretentious birthday and many happy piles of toenail clippings. Now let's all sing together: "Happy Leftover Fruitcake to you!"

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