Alexander the Great

In 356 BC, Phillip of Macedonia, the ruler of a province in northern Greece, became the father of a bouncing baby (noun) named Alexander. Alexander's teacher was Aristotle, the famous (noun). When he was 20 years old, his father was murdered by (celebrity), after which he became (noun) of all Macedonia. In 334, he invaded Persia and defeated (celebrity) at the battle of (a place). Later, at Arbela, he won his most important victory over Darius the Third. This made him (noun) (silly word) over all Persians. Then he marched to India, and many of his (plural noun) died. After that, Alexander began drinking too much (liquid), and at the age of 33, he died of an infection in the (part of the body). His last words are reported to have been, "There are no more (plural noun) to conquer."

Millie said...
In 356 BC, Phillip of Macedonia, the ruler of a province in northern Greece, became the father of a bouncing baby lady who gets mad if you tell her her slip is showing named Alexander. Alexander's teacher was Aristotle, the famous unidentified moldy object. When he was 20 years old, his father was murdered by Dylan McKay, after which he became shrimp cocktail of all Macedonia. In 334, he invaded Persia and defeated Brandon Walsh at the battle of Sordidville, CA. Later, at Arbela, he won his most important victory over Darius the Third. This made him flagellum a gooey gooey gooey over all Persians. Then he marched to India, and many of his seamed stockings died. After that, Alexander began drinking too much mysterious goo, and at the age of 33, he died of an infection in the toe. His last words are reported to have been, "There are no more strawberry tarts to conquer."

Heffalump said...
In 356 BC, Phillip of Macedonia, the ruler of a province in northern Greece, became the father of a bouncing baby hummus named Alexander. Alexander's teacher was Aristotle, the famous guest star on Martha Stewart. When he was 20 years old, his father was murdered by Mike the Headless Chicken, after which he became Pillsbury dough boy of all Macedonia. In 334, he invaded Persia and defeated Pauly Shore at the battle of Fruita. Later, at Arbela, he won his most important victory over Darius the Third. This made him half-eaten sandwich farfegnugen over all Persians. Then he marched to India, and many of his sea monkeys died. After that, Alexander began drinking too much beaten egg, and at the age of 33, he died of an infection in the thumb knuckle. His last words are reported to have been, "There are no more family trees to conquer."

Klin said...
In 356 BC, Phillip of Macedonia, the ruler of a province in northern Greece, became the father of a bouncing baby nose picking 3rd grader named Alexander. Alexander's teacher was Aristotle, the famous trail mix. When he was 20 years old, his father was murdered by Avril Lavigne, after which he became stuffed hippopotamus of all Macedonia. In 334, he invaded Persia and defeated Taylor Lautner at the battle of Campus Dorm. Later, at Arbela, he won his most important victory over Darius the Third. This made him smelly old gym bag sexified over all Persians. Then he marched to India, and many of his partay supplies died. After that, Alexander began drinking too much Dreft detergent, and at the age of 33, he died of an infection in the cuticle. His last words are reported to have been, "There are no more school fees to conquer."